How To Silence Your Inner Critic

Do you tell yourself that you can't accomplish an assigned task before even working on it? Do you scrutinize your appearance when you look at yourself in the mirror? Or do you believe that you're simply not good enough to achieve success in life? If these thoughts sound all too familiar, it means that you've been listening to your inner critic.

Your inner critic is the voice inside your head that judges, demeans, and disapproves of your thoughts and actions. This voice is a manifestation of your fears and doubts. In fact, The New York Times notes that people beat themselves up because of a negative value they've attached to past experiences. This self-criticism can easily lead to poor mental wellbeing, low self-esteem, and a greater risk of failure.

The mind is a powerful force, especially when your inner critic is speaking loudly. Fortunately, you also have the power to control it. Here's how you can stop being your own worst enemy.

Stop Criticizing, Start Sympathizing

Let's say your friend goes to you because they are going through a tough time and shares their insecurities with you. Would you tell your friend those feelings of self-doubt are true? Of course not, as a friend, you would support them by reminding them of their value. If you can easily sympathize with your friends or even family, it's time to show that same sympathy to yourself.

It’s important to show yourself compassion the way you would your loved ones, especially if you are currently facing your own set of struggles, too. Indeed, Maryville University psychologists explain how your mental health has a profound impact on your ability to learn at school or perform at work, so it’s important to cut yourself some slack if you need to take a step back for a while. After all, you won't perform to the best of your ability if your head's not in the right place.

The first step towards allowing yourself to grow is to rephrase your self-talk to become a little more forgiving and understanding, rather than always finding fault with yourself. Most of the time, the sort of criticism we lobby towards ourselves is really undeserved. It's important to recognize when you're putting yourself down, so you can start fostering compassion and sympathy in the way you speak to yourself.

Befriend Your Inner Voice

No matter how much you want to, there's no escaping that inner voice. It stems from your personal experiences, whether it's a childhood memory etched in your mind or the lingering pain from a broken relationship. Moreover, completely cutting it off is actually counter-productive, as researchers from the University of Toronto point out that your inner voice can make you more self-controlled because it helps you control your impulses. The key to properly dealing with your inner critic is how you treat it.

While some methods entail giving it a name and telling it to go away, doing so will only lead to more rumination since you're trying to curb personal issues that you need to address for your healing. Instead of concealing those thoughts, you should confront them — with compassion. In our 'How to Use Self-Compassion as a Motivator' post, we discussed how we can still be critical of ourselves while we're using self-compassion, as it helps us recognize the positive in what our inner critic says. For instance, if you're struggling to eat healthily, instead of deeming yourself to be helpless, you can become more aware of your need to improve your self-control and therefore your change your diet.

What's more, fighting your critic ultimately means that you're fighting yourself. It's essential that you cultivate joy in this journey since Entrepreneur reports that studies show that being happy leads to productivity and creativity — key factors in building your self-esteem. When it comes to properly handling your inner critic, don't forget that you have the power to regain control of your mind.

****Article contribute by Patty Fraser Exclusively for meridian-counseling.com